I could marry this guy

The phone rang around nine last night.  It was Judy.  “Didja watch Obama?  What did you think?”

I mumbled something, asked how Harry was and then gave the phone to Sweetie for a protracted conversation about weddings, grandkids and whatnot.  I muted the TV so as not to disturb the ladies and flipped to an old Bob Mitchum movie on Turner.  Old gangster flicks are pretty basic so I didn’t miss the sound.

Thinking about Judy’s question made me revisit my feelings about the infomercial.  Earlier in the day I had clicked on the TV expecting to find it at five o’clock my time.  After all, the media said it was on at eight eastern time and we are three hours removed from them.  When all I could find on TV was the usual inane stuff, I realized that it was going to run at eight “everyone’s time.”  Bummer.  I was disappointed and at a loss for how to spend my time during the next three hours.

I remembered that the Phillies and Rays were scheduled to complete the fifth game of the series, one that could end it for the Rays.  So I switched to Fox and watched the fans shiver in the Philadelphia cold.  Even Joe Maddon, the Rays manager, wore this funny baseball cap with earlaps.  I was reminded again that baseball is the only professional sport where out of shape old guys wear the same uniforms as their players.

I watched the Phillies trying to close out the Rays.  I also kept my eye on the clock.  About 6:30 my time.  Plenty of time for the Phillies to dispose of the Rays and for me to keep my appointment with Barack at 8.  But, then I thought “It’s nearly eight somewhere else.  What if the game goes into extra innings and the folks in the Mountain time zone get distracted from Obama?  Crap.”  Until then I didn’t much care who won the game.  Now I was petrified by the thought that the game would drag on and viewers would miss the all-important $5 million infomercial.  Come on Phillies!

My fears were eased when the Phillies triumphed just a few minutes before 8, Mountain time.  Surely, the folks in Colorado and New Mexico would now switch to CBS, NBC or whatever to see the Muslim guy speak.  But wait, what the hell was going on?  The Phillies were doing obligatory handstands, back slapping and piling on each other in the middle of the field.  What fun.  Fox was replaying the last out of the game from every possible angle using the plethora of cameras positioned all over the stadium.  Nauseating interviews were about to begin with everyone including the peanut vendors.  My god, won’t this ever end!

Mercifully, it did.  Now all I had to worry about was keeping my eye on the clock until the appointed time arrived.  Thank goodness for Direct TV autotuning.

Sweetie and I watched and didn’t say much.  Thoughts that included “pretty slick, where did they get those people, and what are other viewers thinking” rattled around in my head.  About two-thirds of the way through it my eyes teared up…just like they do when I go to the opera.  I thought, “What a travesty if this guy doesn’t win, what an awful travesty.”  Not one word about McCain.  Not one mention of Palin.  Not one negative thought.

Somewhere near the end of it Sweetie sat up and said “Now I know why Michelle married him.”


4 Responses to “I could marry this guy”

  1. 1 Kit October 30, 2008 at 11:56 am

    An Ojai friend sent me your link when I told her that I expected to spend the rest of my life on the floor if he loses. Everyone I know is completely distracted by this election and can’t get any work done for all the worrying and the door belling and phone calling and website checking. Every little drop in the polls, every new story about voter suppression sends us into a tizzy. I know one voter can’t make all that much difference, but if I don’t do everything I can to make this work, I’ll never forgive myself…


  2. 2 June October 30, 2008 at 3:12 pm

    Same choke in the throat here — I could marry that guy also (don’t tell Shed) and same nervous tizzy as Kit — so I’m off now to do phone banking…


  3. 3 Mark Schneider October 30, 2008 at 8:10 pm

    Yeah, I could marry that guy my self, but I still haven’t solidified my position on Prop.8


  4. 4 Elizabeth Bowman October 31, 2008 at 4:51 pm

    Hey Fred/Ila: Kenley introduced me to your blog. I had the same experience watching the infomercial (after initial hesitation about the need to – I’ve already sent in my ballot!): gee, this is over the top and smarmy and then…I was hooked, and moved. Further, I thought if I could send a transcript, with the attribution missing, I believe my super right-wing sister would embrace his plans and ideas. In fact, I know it. Instead I called my daughter and we simultaneously said: I love him.


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